In a jumble

I took my first run of 2013 today.  I ran three miles and walked one more as my cool down.  It was nice to find out that three miles isn't a killer distance and that after a month off, I wasn't wiped out at the end.  While my feet slapped the pavement, I was reminded of the image of a jewelry tumbler.  While it goes around and around on its base, the shot inside is rubbing away the sharp nibs and polishing dull stones into gleaming gems.  I'm not equating my thoughts or feelings with precious metal nor expensive gems, however, the image was useful.  I haven't fully worked it out yet, still tumbling around -- but it works in connection with my two words for 2013 acceptance and action.

As I tumbled my feelings during my run, I was trying to take off the sharp edges of my self berating for not running since November 25th.  Acceptance.  I've been doing the best that I can each day to balance family, professional work, home chores, personal space for reading, running, relaxing, or reflection -- and throw in the holidays on top.   There is a realization that I can't do everything, every day.  Today I took action by lacing up my sneakers, layering my outerwear for the cold and stepping outside.  My time was not fast.  Acceptance.  But I put forth the effort.  Action.

Yesterday was my first day at work with my own team to supervise.  After floating and filling in since June, I'm now the shepherd for seven specialists.  I had preconceived notions that the past six months would give me a semi-solid foundation from which I could build my team.  I've never felt like such a ninny as I did last night.  Two hours in and I'm hit with question after question that I have no idea how to answer.  I had never come across those problems myself and the answers were a mystery at the time.  Pad, pad, pad down the corridor I went to my colleague's office.  "Excuse me, do you have a moment for another question?"  Jeez, I felt like such a hapless supervisor.

What a night.  I didn't think that I would encounter three plus scenarios before dinner that I didn't know how to handle.  As I run today...slap of the foot...acceptance...crush the ice at the side of the road with my other foot...acceptance.  I'm going to be OK.  I'm not expected to know everything all at once.  Acceptance.   And then my thoughts turn over to action.  How can I improve?  What are the resources I need that are readily available?  Start writing down these situations and resolutions so that there is a record for the next time or the new person who might need the answer some day.  Action.

I needed today -- my last compressed Tuesday.  A day to be home by myself without the expectations of weekend chores or being parent on duty at all times.  By the time I pick up my Lovey Lamb, I will have had seven hours of solitude.  I've run, reflected, relaxed, written, and eaten a delicious lunch of farro, avocado, salsa and fried cubed tofu.  Not too shabby.  (acceptance)